Hall of Fame baby?

Before we plan for what the doctors have referred to as an "induction" on Tuesday, I have to set the record straight. As an editor, I can no longer go along with this accepted terminology.

The noun form of the verb induce is inducement. Induction is the noun form of induct. Webster's agrees with me. More importantly, so does Smitty.

Despite Jessica's improvement with throwing and catching in the last few years, she will not be enshrined in Cooperstown any time soon. Cal Ripken is having an induction. Jessica is having an inducement.

These doctors love to show off how they can spell, constantly referring to themselves as O-B-G-Y-Ns instead of obgyns to prove a point. But I guess they don't teach grammar in med school.

Just had to get that off my chest.

P.S. With Sunday looming as April Fool's Day, we pledge to you that no jokes will be made regarding the baby's birth. If we tell you on Sunday we had the kid, you can be certain it's the truth. I'm just not sure the expecting grandparents could handle that kind of a prank.

Evacuation

The end is in sight! Assuming baby continues to refuse all negotiations and does not come out on his or her own, I am scheduled to be induced at 8am on Tuesday, April 3. This date offers many advantages, including:

1) Kevin being able to watch the championship game of the Men's NCAA basketball tournament

2) Missing at least one Passover seder (no offense, Terry & Elliott)

3) Baby having diamond as his / her birthstone (although this may prove to be a disadvantage to us in later years)

Of course, there is always the possibility that baby will defy the odds and be born tomorrow, the official due date. I would find this particularly ironic given my love of probabilities as an epidemiologist (~ 2% of babies are born on their due date).

Stay tuned!

Dress rehearsal

At least we'll know exactly where to go and what to do when it's time to go to the hospital for real, whenever that may be.

Jessica was having contractions Friday night and Saturday morning. They were regular but not severe (easy for me to say, but that's by her own admission) and got to 5 minutes apart on Saturday. We called the doctor and he figured that with her already dilated and contractions close together we should come in to get checked out. Turns out things hadn't changed from Wednesday's checkup.

Instead of sending us home, they had us walk around for 2 hours. Really only Jessica had to walk, but me being the supportive husband that I am, I walked with her. Of course I was really trying to find a TV with the basketball games on, but that's besides the point.

So after becoming experts on the hallways of the hospital and learning that Ohio State had beaten Memphis (the baby had picked Texas A&M to win that game, but more on baby's tournament picks in a future post), another checkup revealed no more progress and we came home.

Hopefully the real thing comes soon. Sundown tomorrow is the cutoff date for a boy, otherwise there will be a bris on Passover and who ever heard of matzah and lox?

Testing out the old wives tales - Part 2

Ok, neither the laps around the basement nor the Indian food I ate for lunch yesterday put me into labor, so it seems that we're in for another round of experiments today. The agenda: caffeine, some laps around Babies R Us, and hopefully some spicy Mexican or Thai food for dinner tonight.

I realize that all of my fellow researchers out there are saying "but Jessica, you cannot test all of these things at once, how will you know which one caused the labor" (not to even mention testing causality). However, I am throwing my research techniques to the wind with this one, just get baby out!

If you have any suggestions for things that might put me into labor please let me know.

Testing out the old wives tales

Determined to help get baby out of me as soon as possible, the scientist in me is testing out some old wives tales to see if they really work. Today's test - eating spicy Indian food. I met my friend JR for lunch at Akbar where we dined on some delicious, albeit not spicy (at least for my standards) treats. Will this work? Stay tuned . . .

And the countdown continues . . .

Today's visit to the doctor was promising. I am a full 3 centimeters dialated, 75% effaced, and baby is between -1 and -2 station. Basically this means that baby could decide to arrive any day now, or wait a week or two just to torture us. Stay tuned!

Not so much madness

So much for exciting first round games in the tournament putting Jessica into labor. Only the Duke game came close enough, and since we picked Duke to win but also wanted them to lose, we were too torn to be invested enough to cause contractions.

Sadly, after one day of games, Jessica has 11 right, I have 12, and the baby has 13. But baby's already got 3 games wrong for Saturday, so he/she's not spending its pool winnings just yet.

Beavis Langbaum?

We got some good news today at the doctor. The ultrasound confirms the baby is facing head down. We had been told it was breech and were planning for a c-section, but now it looks like that's not definitely in the cards. We're now questioning if it was ever breech, because it still feels the same from the outside. Unfortunately, what the doctor had thought was a head is baby's butt. At least we're certain now that I'm the father! (Hey, I know most of you were going to make jokes at my expense, so I figured I'd beat you to it.)

So now we just wait for Jessica to go into labor. We're hoping because she's so small it's sooner rather than later.

In the meantime, here are pictures of Jessica and her belly as well as some from the ultrasound. You can even see the face! Click here for the pictures. (You can email me at kevlang821@yahoo.com if you have trouble seeing them.)

Until the next time...